Welcome to Vitamin G, where you get real answers to all your wellness questions. The first topic on the docket: sex toys. When it comes to your health, sexual pleasure should be a priority. It allows for an open and mature conversation about knowing your body, exploring what you love, and your boundaries.
Discussing sex and tools to reach your pleasure points can seem invasive, but it’s also essential to find what works for you and know there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
“Remember, every woman should know what an orgasm is,” says Moment of Clarity Health Center specialist Jeff Yoo. “Do your best to self-soothe by giving up on shame and guilt. Shame being how you feel about yourself and guilt being how you feel about what you do.”
Let’s be real: dating in the digital age as a Zillennial can be difficult, and there’s been a decline in sex for Gen Z within the past few years. According to a 2021 social survey conducted by The University of Chicago, three in 10 Generation Z males, ages 18 to 25, reported having gone without sex the prior year. Additionally, one in four Gen Z women also reported having no sex the prior year. Opening the floodgates of constant discourse, we’re seeing Zillennials become vocal about what they want regarding sexual satisfaction, so why not start with self-pleasure to increase your personal happiness? Check out the key factors to know when searching for your first sex toy.
Take A Partner Or Friend On Your Search
As many Zillennials are learning about themselves and their bodies, a rush of questions can run through the mind. Take a friend or partner on your search to make the experience more of an adventure rather than confusing or embarrassing. Plus, it’ll make for a funny conversation starter later in life.
“It is natural for you to feel anxious, especially your first time going to a sex toy store. Don’t go alone,” Woo tells GU. “Take your partner or someone for that experience and guide into the unknown. Learn of your options and ask questions, even write them down, and if you struggle, give them your written words to assist you.”
Consider Your Allergies And Sensitivities
Like any shopping experience, whether it’s food, clothes or sex toys, you need to be aware of your allergies and what irritates your skin and body. According to clinical nurse and sexual health expert Janelle King, aiming for toys made of non-porous material is safer and user-friendly.
“Non-porous sex toys can be cleaned and sanitized easily since they don’t absorb lubes and bodily fluids nor grow any bacteria or viruses, “ King tells GU. “ Examples include medical grade and body-safe silicone, Acrylonitrile Butadiene Styrene (ABS plastic), or stainless steel.”
There’s No One Size Fits All
Unfortunately, social media pushes propaganda on what society deems a valuable size. However, your personal experience shouldn’t be determined by what you should consider satisfying. While you are looking for pleasure, you don’t want to damage or tear your vaginal area. According to Woo, the important factors to remember when searching for a toy are girth, length and G-spot. The tool for you should be personalized to satisfy your needs.
“It is advised to start small and consider comfortability, then increase the more experience you have,” Woo says.
Figure Out What Sensation You Want To Feel
Pleasing yourself looks different for everyone. There will be some trial and error, so don’t think you must start building a collection immediately. Ask yourself these questions: What pleases you? Is it suction, vibration, or movement? Do you want your toy to focus on a specific body part?
“Focus on choosing a toy that will fulfill your specific purpose, like clitoral stimulation, anal intercourse, or something else,” King says.
Find Something That Fits Your Budget
While purchasing sex toys can be a fun adventure, it can be a new expense added to your daily budget. Yes, a toy with multiple functions can be stimulating, but also work your way up so you are not hurting your pockets.
“Figure out how much you want to spend on a toy. If you’re just beginning to explore your sexual pleasure, it may take some time to discover which toy works best for you. So, think about buying something at a lower price point initially, then upgrading to a more expensive toy later.”
Embarking on sexual discovery is a fun and exciting moment for anyone, so continue to find the excitement when exploring new ways to achieve self-pleasure or going through this experience for the first time. Remember, we all deserve to venture out for liberation in 2024, so let’s get to it, and we’ll see you next time for another dose of Vitamin G.
About the Author: Kenyatta Victoria is the lead writer for Essence GU, working on all things pop culture, politics, entertainment and business. Throughout her time at GU, she’s garnered devoted readers and specializes in the Zillennial point of view.