Essence gu™
  • FASHION
    • FASHION NEWS
    • ACCESSORIES
    • FEATURES
    • FASHION WEEK
  • BEAUTY
    • SKIN
    • MAKEUP
    • HAIR
    • NAILS
  • ENTERTAINMENT
    • GU JAMS
    • FILM
    • TV
    • RADIO
    • BOOKS
    • TECH
    • SPORTS
  • WELLNESS
    • RELATIONSHIPS
    • SEX
    • HEALTH
    • FOOD
    • ASTROLOGY
  • BUSINESS
    • ENTREPRENEURSHIP
    • MONEY
    • CAREERS
    • ADVICE
  • FEEDBACK
    • NEWS
    • IDENTITY
    • ACTIVISM
    • POLITICS
    • LET’S TALK ABOUT IT
  • SHOPPING
    • FASHION
    • BEAUTY
    • TECH
    • LIFESTYLE
  • Videos
  • GU Summit 2024
  • ESSENCE.COM
  • SUBSCRIBE TO NEWSLETTER
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Service

Subscribe to Trending News

Our weekly newsletter with the latest celebrity news, fashion updates, interviews and exclusive offers!

Your email is required.
Your email is in invalid format.
Confirm email is required.
Email did not match.
By clicking Subscribe Now, you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. By supplying your cell phone number, you consent to receive marketing messages from ESSENCE. Please note that standard messaging rates apply from your provider.
  • FASHION
    • FASHION NEWS
    • ACCESSORIES
    • FEATURES
    • FASHION WEEK
  • BEAUTY
    • SKIN
    • MAKEUP
    • HAIR
    • NAILS
  • ENTERTAINMENT
    • GU JAMS
    • FILM
    • TV
    • RADIO
    • BOOKS
    • TECH
    • SPORTS
  • WELLNESS
    • RELATIONSHIPS
    • SEX
    • HEALTH
    • FOOD
    • ASTROLOGY
  • BUSINESS
    • ENTREPRENEURSHIP
    • MONEY
    • CAREERS
    • ADVICE
  • FEEDBACK
    • NEWS
    • IDENTITY
    • ACTIVISM
    • POLITICS
    • LET’S TALK ABOUT IT
  • SHOPPING
    • FASHION
    • BEAUTY
    • TECH
    • LIFESTYLE
  • Videos
  • GU Summit 2024
  • ESSENCE.COM
  • SUBSCRIBE TO NEWSLETTER
Home • Bo$$y

Why Is Saying 'No' To People So Hard Sometimes?

Setting boundaries is vital to your mental and emotional health.
Why Is Saying ‘No’ To People So Hard Sometimes?
By Brooklyn White · Updated May 1, 2024

Black women are conditioned to give. “No” is not a word that we regularly use, whether out of fear or perceived obligation. Many of us are afraid that our “no” will be a source of tension—or worse, ignored altogether. It’s a precarious, rather uncomfortable position that we didn’t ask to be in. But, we’re now understanding the power of saying no, whether it’s to our partners, our parents, or our peers.

It’s unrealistic to assume that everyone will be able to seamlessly transition into confidently telling people no. I’m reminded of my own recent encounters that pushed me to stand up for myself, and how anxious I was. When you’ve made saying yes to everyone your life’s mission, “no” seems like a betrayal. It’s important to remember that constantly pleasing people only betrays you.

Below, we have a few tips for how to become more comfortable saying no.

Do It Frequently

Chances are, you’ve been prioritizing other people’s happiness over your own for a while. Saying no as often as you can may seem like a bit much, but think of it this way: you’re just making up for all of the times you wanted to say it, but didn’t. Anytime your intuition tells you “no,” listen to it and repeat it with your chest.

Be Honest

When we’re you’re truthful about who we are and what to expect, we’re much better off. Sometimes we trip ourselves up with little lies, like saying yes to a dinner invite when we’re disinterested, and then accepting an extra glass of wine when we’re already good. When a person stands in their truth, it’s that much easier for that “no” to roll off of their tongue.

Trust Yourself

You’re making the right decision! When we’re used to “no” being met with backlash, we may start to think that we’re in the wrong. But a person’s inability to handle your boundaries is their problem, not yours. You have to believe that you’re making the best decision for yourself and taking care of your mental health.

TOPICS:  black women boundaries mental health no
Stacey Abrams Talks Trump’s Futile Attempts To Overthrow Georgia Election Results

COMPANY
INFORMATION

OUR COMPANY
CONTACT US
JOB OPPORTUNITIES

SUBSCRIBE

NEWSLETTERS
DISCOVER MORE EVENTS
Follow Us

MORE ON
ESSENCE GU™

HOME
RELATIONSHIPS
BEAUTY
HAIR
FASHION
EVENTS

ESSENCE GU™ is part of ESSENCE Ventures

ESSENCE GU™ may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Offers may be subject to change without notice.

©2023 ESSENCE Ventures. All Rights Reserved. | Privacy Policy | Terms of Use | Essence.com Advertising Terms