In the age of endless trends, being completely yourself has become more of a rarity. TikTok is one of the main hubs for the find your identity through clothing agenda, and has contributed to an underrated issue plaguing fashion today: the personal style crisis. The monumental platform that dictates what to wear and how to wear clothing is now synonymous with some of the industry’s most respected magazines and sources when it’s really a regurgitation of trends from the early aughts, ‘90s, and so on. In the past three years (and even days into the new year), we’ve seen a dominating obsession with attaching your outfit to a “micro trend” or “core,” and it’s honestly exhausting. Isn’t fashion supposed to be about self-expression, not duplication? What happened to personal style?
This current commitment to fostering an inauthentic sense of fashion points to a longstanding fact we often forget: style isn’t something you necessarily find. It isn’t shopping your favorite influencer’s closet and putting your spin on the look. Style is an outward reflection of a certain elan that only you possess. It’s expressing yourself through clothes, not to be mistaken for a destination—but something you experience over time, coinciding with the evolution of your character, beliefs, and identity. That’s why GU tapped stylist Alaïa Ryan to remind us of what’s most important when crafting your style.
For the New York-based creative who’s worked with the likes of Jalen Hurts and Nike, personal style is “the way I tell people exactly who I am without having to speak,” as she puts it. And Ryan’s style definitely speaks for itself most effortlessly. Through her brand NAYR Studio, she creates statement-making, yet timeless heart-shaped bags, reflective of the versatility and ease seen in her outfits; she can rock anything from a tulle dress and embellished Crocs to a white tank and cowhide pants.
Ahead, Ryan shares premier tips for discovering your style, the best purchase she’s ever made, and more.
Girls United: What does personal style mean to you?
Alaïa Ryan: It’s the way I tell people exactly who I am without having to speak. As a person who isn’t the most expressive with words, I find comfort in being able to tailor my looks to how I feel and how I want to show up in the world.
GU: Have you found your style?
AR: I’d say yes, for now. I love my style because I have a formula that works for me. But, of course, as I continue to grow, my style will evolve too. As my interests and experiences change, and as life goes on, I’m sure my taste will shift a bit. I don’t think I’ll stray too far from what I’m doing now. Specific pieces I choose might change, but the foundation of what shapes my next era will likely stay the same.
GU: What pieces make a successful wardrobe?
AR: It’s crucial to have essential basics for both day-to-day wear and going out—think white T-shirts, a great pair of denim, a black dress, and classic black pumps, just to name a few. More importantly, invest in versatile pieces that you can style in multiple ways. Look for quality fabrics that will last and pieces in your closet that carry a story worth telling. Also, everyone needs a black motorcycle jacket in their wardrobe! You can find a great one at a thrift store for a reasonable price. I bought mine at Buffalo Exchange back in 2016 for $83, and it’s still the best purchase I’ve ever made.
GU: With fashion being so trend-driven, how can readers discover (or rediscover) their personal style without looking like everyone else?
AR: Your “why” is everything! Start by going through your closet and asking yourself why you love certain pieces you’ve purchased (beyond just thinking they’re cute, lol). If you can’t come up with 2–3 detailed reasons why a piece resonates with you, it’s probably time to let it go. I do this with my friends all the time. For the items that no longer feel like you, dig into why they don’t resonate anymore.
Use this same mindset when you’re shopping; it’ll help you filter out the unnecessary and stay focused. At the end of the day, it’s about understanding who you are and what you genuinely like, not what someone else told you to like. Once you’ve done that, you can start building.
GU: What factors do you consider when putting an outfit together? What about when shopping?
AR: First, I think about where I’m going. Is it dinner with friends? A brand event? A chill get-together? A date? (I love a good date fit, btw). From there, I ask myself: what message do I want to send to the person or people I’ll be around? Next, I focus on fit. It’s essential that I dress in a way that complements my height and size. Lastly, I think about how I can make people do a double take. I’m drawn to pieces that catch attention—something that earns a compliment or will make someone ask the question, “Where did you get that?”
When I’m shopping, the same rules apply, but I’m always looking for a good deal. If I find something I like in-store, I’ll check online to see if I can find it for a better price before deciding to purchase. Always do your research.
GU: Do you think social media helps with figuring out your style?
AR: Absolutely! There are so many tiers of brands waiting to be discovered. Discovery is important for style. I think it’s really about taking an extra step to do your research. Instead of buying what an influencer is promoting, look at the brand for other pieces that might interest you. Brands will send an influencer something that’s new, best-selling, or a piece that needs a push. I challenge anyone reading this article to find another product in that brand to purchase that’s just as good. Or if you absolutely adore the piece someone is wearing, I say style it differently. Do the opposite of the obvious, if possible.
GU: What’s the biggest style hack that you always practice with yourself that people can use every day?
AR: The biggest style hack I always practice with myself is understanding proportions. I pay attention to the balance of my outfits. For example, if I’m wearing something oversized on top, I’ll keep the bottom more fitted, and vice versa. This instantly creates a more put-together look for me.
GU: Any other tips you have for finding your personal style?
AR: It’s important to put the phone down for a while and explore other sources of inspiration. Try something you wouldn’t normally do—visit a museum, take a walk, paint, travel, read a book, or watch a foreign film. If you drive a lot, consider taking the train and people-watching (depending on where you live). It doesn’t matter what you choose, just do something different. Do it alone, with friends, or with your partner, whatever feels right. Lean into it, because that moment is called connection—and that’s where you can begin to not only discover your own style but more of yourself.
